"That's easy..." he says "...Marie's got blonde hair and Brian's got a beard.". “Did you hear about the actress that stabbed her husband last night?” A blonde lady is going to the doctor Why did the Blonde feel so proud of herself for finishing a jigsaw puzzle in only six months? Do you know a good joke which isn't here.

A blonde was going up an escalator when it broke down. ", Three women are about to be executed for crimes.

"Get some toilet paper" he said. The salesman answered: "Cause that's a microwave. Hear about the blonde who froze to death at the Drive-in movie? A blonde is pulled over by a police officer... If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first? the blonde asked. She said, "I might be blonde, but I know how many one is.". Guy replies, yes I have one that is just under two. Great blonde jokes; The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. One of them starts yelling: HELP, HEEEELP Knock on the door. The blonde says no, its toothpaste this time. The cow fell on her. ", A blonde goes into a laundry mat and asks to have her sweater cleaned. "What for?" Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911? Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench… One blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away, Florida or the moon?" Brunette turns to her and says: "We should shout together." “Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no.”, Blonde walks into a... How do you confuse a blonde?

"Well, you can paint my porch. She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . She replied, A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar that reads: Blonde: I want my first daughter to be a girl. One said, "It's dark in here isn't it?" The third blonde said "Nope, they are goat tracks!" the librarian says, “excuse me, but this is a library!” A blonde walks into a library and says to the librarian "CAN I GET A BIG MAC FRIES AND A COKE?!!" In a husky, deep voice,the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, you should know something. "Hey lady," says the shepherd, "if I guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?". Ever more puzzled the blonde replies "TGIF, thank God it's Friday". She too escapes execution. oh..I saw this on youporn" she said," they call it bufferring". Again the salesman said: "No, we don't sell to blondes." A blonde went to the library She snaps back,"Ok,acquire a church singing group. I want a cheeseburger. she cries. I'm not moving until the plane arrives in Jamaica" She thought it was diet coke. The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer.

After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?” 'Why are you wearing an Alaskan and a winter coat?' She sighs and thinks to herself “thank god I’m a leftie!”. I wonder if it's mine. . Doctor: Hello miss, what's the issue? oh..I saw this on youporn" she said," they call it bufferring". Police found six bullet holes in her mirror. What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. Anyway, two engineers tied a blonde to a flagpole or something, A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. "Yes," she purrs. Hide and seek champion of 1846. why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead? She says, It got cold so I turned off the fan.

She fell out of the tree. the blonde then quietly whispers, “i’m sorry - can i have a burger and fries?”, A blonde was fired from an m&m's factory Each on of US is blonde. A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. The flight attendant is coming around checking tickets. I got a compliment on my driving today said a blonde to her friend. The blonde blushes slightly and giggles, "oh, no it's just mustard this time.". The blonde swims 5 miles before getting tired and swimming back to the island. it really hurts!" Our top collection of funny blonde jokes, including everything from dumb blonde examples to plain silliness! "Omg that accordion looks so cool I gotta have it, how much is it" ", A blonde was watching the news when she suddenly hears “American rights are being violated” She said, "I might be blonde, but I know how many one is.". The librarian said, "So you're the one who took our phone book. Police found six bullet holes in her mirror. ", Two blondes fell down a hole. So she left again and came back with her hair dyed black and said: "I want that tv." How much will you charge?" The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She heard that he was well hung. Doctor: Ah okay, anything wrong? The second blonde said "No those are totally moose tracks... " She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. Artificial intelligence "Do you have any kids?" The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. A police officer asked her what happened. ", The librarian said, "So you're the one who took our phone book.". Poof! Once when it is told. The second says to the first "hurry up! She gets on a plane and sits in the first available seat. To see what was on the other side. Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper. She threw it off a cliff. "You're finished already?" You’d think at least one of them would’ve seen it.

He comes back to where the blonde is sitting and leans over and whispers something in her ear. ", What time is it?

Pregnant. The brunette swims 2 miles before drowning. However, please tell me if someone else has a similar one. Read more funny pages, check out our full list below! The first blonde said "Those look like deer tracks! Why can't blondes make ice cubes? After a moment’s silence, the first blonde says to the other, “Wow, I think that’s the quickest we’ve ever got to the scene of an accident.”. The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."

There is no way I could possibly eat 8 slices. What’s more, the fella sitting next to me is blonde and he’s a weightlifter. The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. What do you call a blonde skeleton in a closet? . Three blondes walk into a building. The woman to your right is a blonde, and she’s a pro wrestler. ", Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown. When she trips over the cordless phone. ", I asked him "How do you tell them apart?". The man didn't hear too well and asked, "Come again"? A blonde, brunette, and redhead are stuck on a deserted island 10 miles from shore. He is stunned but keeps his word and allows her to pick a sheep. She then responds "I'm a blonde, I'm smart and have a good job. It is not even hard to understand the best blonde jokes but believe me if there is a true blonde near you, she or he might not even get what you are saying. How do you know a blonde has been trying to commit suicide? How can you make a blonde go on the roof? Why can't a blonde dial 911? A professor told his class: "What for?" The laundromat attendant doesn't hear her correctly and says, "come again?" "What's a 7-letter word for 'easily perceived or understood' that starts with 'O'?" What do u call a blonde that dyed their hair? "Yes," I replied.

She kept throwing in the garbage all those defective m&m's with a "w", A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners The blonde said "How about 50 dollars?" HELP!" Doctor: ... Why did the blonde throw her iPad into the ocean? They say "We finished this puzzle in only 6 months! ", One blonde says to her friend, "Awww. I could never eat twelve pieces. she said "I'm WINNING! Tell her that drinks are on the house. He walks up to the bar and beckons one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks. Aim . What do you call a blond with an actual brain? The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I’m a 6′ tall, 200 pound blonde with a black belt in karate. "Isn't it obvious?" and says 'good morning' to the elderly attendant and hands him a blouse. The first blonde said, "Those are bear tracks!" She needs to drag her finger across the words as she's reading street signs. 16. He sits down next to her and says "So, do I come here often?". What should you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? "I am."

She spent the next two hours figuring out how to pick it up.

What do you do when a blonde girl throws a grenade at you? "Get some toilet paper" he said. They found a lamp and rubbed it. She giggles and says, “No…it’s just mustard this time.”, A blonde goes up to a priest and asks,"Do you know how much it is to rent a church singing group?"

"Fame will come to you only after you succeed!" Shine a flashlight in her ears. "Oh look!

When I touch my arm, ouch! One said, 'It’s dark in here isn’t it?' The other one then suggests: Maybe we should start yelling together Because blonde men are stupid too. CHICKEN SANDWICH: $2.50 A blonde decided to paint a room. "I have one child that's just under two." She blurts out "352!" It said 2-4 years on the box. Blondes have always been famous for their stupidity and that is why they are always targeted.